Dear Classmates,

When I begin to ponder the last four years, instantly a thousand images, sound bytes, phrases spring to mind: time told in the way of our generation. Sifting through these commodities, I search for something deeper. I try to connect the dots, to come up with some cohesive purpose and narrative behind this chapter of my life, a chapter whose close is almost frighteningly imminent. No such grand, overarching moral comes to mind. High school was no pilgrimage for me; it facilitated growth that was meant to occur within myself, inevitable lengthening of perspective. Through some mix of interaction and introversion I learned to navigate reality, and then to discard it all together and build my own from scratch.

I could reminisce upon my nadirs and apexes of this era, but as captivated as all of you would undoubtedly be in my personal history, I’d much rather impart to you the fruits of my introspective labor. I learned, taught by shortcomings and disappointments, to see myself and my place in the world in a highly individualized manner, and this is a course of action I recommend with the utmost earnestness.

Through most of my high school years, I spent my time either meeting or falling short of standards I felt necessary to reach as a meter of self-worth. I immersed myself in selfish pursuance of accolades with a tired approximation of ambition; my motivation was faulty because it was external. In many cases, my delight in the achievements of others was checked by disappointment in my own failings, a tendency I found deeply disturbing even at the time. This emptiness would occasionally cripple me, I blindly rebelled against the achievement-driven society which fed to an even greater sense of inadequacy. When I excelled in certain areas, I was satisfied briefly, but again the affirmation was purely external and therefore fleeting.

A few weeks ago, my next-door neighbor died. This shocked and upset me for obvious reasons, though I’d only interacted with her a handful of times, however I also felt deeply disturbed in the level of self-absorption I’d practiced in the weeks and even months leading up to her death. So self-centered was I, so unconcerned with the struggles of my fellow human beings, that I hadn’t even noticed the emotional, and resulting physical turmoil that she succumbed to. I could have made a difference. I could have noticed, and I could have tried to help. And with this overwhelming sense of regret came the realization that I needed a new set of priorities.

We are taught that selfishness is a survival instinct, and this is a fact that can not be ignored: from the moment we’re born our own needs take precedence. But human beings, through evolution or through spiritual favoritism, have been given the gift of rationality, and eventually we get to decide the source of our own fulfillment. We have all been raised with a certain set of values and standards, though the level of prestige may vary, we are all herded towards seeking the highest level of education, the highest level of income, a path that manages to provide interest and livelihood. This is not a bad way to live, but what most people don’t seem to realize is that it is only one of infinite options. We are the most intelligent species on a planet which by an amalgam of infinitesimal coincidences fosters our existence, and the only requirement to our time here is that we remain alive, which is fairly easy in our advanced society. Literally everything else is up to us. After trying out the traditional approach to life, I found myself dissatisfied and unfulfilled. I need to delight in, empathize, experience, the lives of others in order for my life to have meaning. I am not preaching to you guys. Not everyone finds worth in altruism and a great many equally intelligent people are perfectly happy living within the grid. However, going forward, remember that all of your lives are totally and completely your own. Never waste a day of your limited collection living in emptiness or disillusion, or pandering to the expectations of others. If you find contentment in the life of a bum, by all means take to the streets! The life of a happy bum is infinitely more desirable to me than an unhappy senator or surgeon. In short, each and every one of you has an internal compass, and it is the only one worth following.

I wish all of you the highest level of happiness in whatever paths you follow, and I really love you guys, even those of you I’ve never met.

As Gandalf says “May the wind under your wings bear you where the sun sails and the moon walks”.

Alana