~Hanahaki~

Sitting at a single table, a table for two, looking out at the mesmerizing view,with the sound of groups of people talking, the coffee mugs clinging and clanging against each other, the strong smell of brewing coffee coming up my nose, with light jazz music in the background. Everything was just so calming and perfect. I let out a deep sigh while taking a small sip of my cold brew. While I was doing so I felt two strong arms around my waist, hugging me from behind. I knew exactly who it was.

“Hey Johnny” I said smiling

“Hi Harpy” Johnny said as he let go of my waist and kissed my cheek.

Johnny is my boyfriend, we’ve been dating for about six months now and he’s honestly the best thing that has ever happened to me, he makes me feel a way that I’ve never felt before and he never fails to put a smile on my face. Sometimes I wonder what on earth I did to deserve someone like him.

Johnny sat in the seat in front of me and then I noticed he was hiding something behind him. I squinted my eyes wondering what was behind him. He looked up at me and smirked.

“What? Are my good looks blinding you?” he said in a cocky tone.

“Haha very funny but no I’m wondering what’s behind your back?” I asked

“Oh well uh you see” he started saying getting shy all of sudden. I raised an eyebrow from curiosity.

“Well when I was on my way here I noticed a bush of flowers and I uh saw this flower and it caught my eye” he said lifting his arm from behind, my eyes landing on a small, beautiful, blue flower. I stared in awe and looked up at him.

“I know it’s not a bouquet of flowers and it’s not a rose which is your favorite flower but it was blue and that’s your favorite color and it reminded me of you so I picked it” he said handing the flower to me. I grabbed the flower from him and stared at it and smiled.

“Thank you babe, that’s really sweet, I’ll put it in some water once I get home” I said, setting the flower next to me.

“I’m glad you like it,” he said, reaching his arm out grabbing my hand entwining my fingers together with his. His thumb rubbing against the back of my hand while smiling big.

“I love you so much,” he said, looking straight into my eyes. I felt my face turn into a small tint of pink and my heart beating a thousand times faster. I looked down from embarrassment not wanting him to see my expression.

“I..I love you too” I said, not looking up at him, I heard a small chuckle and I looked up at him. Once I looked up his facial expression changed into a serious one.

“Harper, I know I say this all the time but I really need you to know” he said stopping at mid-sentence. All I could do was stare and give him my full attention.

“I need you to know I’ll never leave you, I will always be by your side no matter what” he said staring straight in my eyes. I smiled at him holding his hand tighter.

“And I’ll never leave you” I said with my voice slowly fading, not being able to hear anything.

 

If you said you wouldn’t leave… why did you?

 

1 year later….

 

The light rain hitting my bedroom window, with light thunder in the background. Sitting in the dark room, hugging my pillow tightly, with dried tears staining my cheeks. Suddenly a lightning hit caused it to brighten up the room but, the main thing it brightened was the single blue flower in the glass. I stared at it, not taking my eyes off the delicate piece. About a moment I heard soft knocks on my door.

“Harper?” I heard from behind the door. I didn’t reply. My door creaked open with the light from the hallway hitting my drained body laying on my bed. The door fully opened revealing my best friend Savannah. I heard her walk towards me and I feel the side of my bed sink.I felt her hand on my arm shaking me.

“You ok sis?” she asked me. I just nodded in response.

“Did you eat anything?” she asked me, while shaking my head no. I heard her sigh and move her hand away from my arm.

“Harper talk to me, honestly!” she said, getting irritated. I didn’t say anything. Savannah just looked at me then looked up to see what I was staring at and figured out what was going on. She sighed deeply and looked down at me once again.

“I’m surprised you still have that,” she said, I knew what she was talking about but,I didn’t want to say anything about it.

“How was your date with Donghyuck?” I asked about trying to change the subject.

“It was good, he says hi by the way” she said.

“Mhm” is all I said.

Suddenly another strike of lightning arose, I looked at the flower lighting up from the bright lightning. All of a sudden I felt this sickness in my stomach. I got up from the bed,and sped/walked towards the bathroom. Then it happened. The blue flower petals coming up my throat, it’s so painful, it feels like I’m suffocating, coughing and coughing and the petals kept falling out of my mouth. I heard heels clicking on the floor, which I knew was Savannah. I felt her hand rubbing my back still trying to deal with the burning pain. After what felt like hours of pain the suffering stopped. Tears streaming down my face, my mouth dried out, my throat burning like no tomorrow, and trying to catch my breath. Savannah left the bathroom and came back with a glass of water. Handing me the small glass I took a sip of the cold water and took one last deep breath.

“Harper you can’t keep on going through this” Savannah said sitting on the bathroom floor with me. I couldn’t say anything, I kept processing the horrible pain I just went through.

“Harp you’re miserable this disease isn’t gonna help you” she said. I just sat there tears streaming down my face not knowing what to respond to.

“This is the 7th time this year you went through this and I can’t stand seeing you go through it, I know you love him but, what pain you’re dealing with isn’t going to bring him back” Savannah said sounding like she was going to break down any second.

“Why did he leave?” was the only thing that could come out of my mouth.

“I don’t know Harper but, it’s not your fault” she said. There was silence for a while till Savannah spoke, “I’m not going to force you to do this but, you can get this Hanahaki disease surgically removed and then you won’t have to..”

“But then my love for him will go away and whenever I hear his name I won’t feel anything. . . just numb” I said interrupting her.

“I know Harper but Johnny wouldn’t want you to be in pain, he would want you to move on and keep doing what you always have done” she said in a soft voice. I sat there for a minute.

“Can you bring me the flower and my phone for me?” I asked Savannah.

“Yeah sure,I’ll be right back” she said leaving the bathroom. A few seconds later she came back with what I asked for and handed me the stuff. I set my phone to the side and took the small blue flower out of the glass and just stared at it.

“I’ll leave you alone for right now, I’m gonna make you something to eat” Savannah said walking out and closing the door behind her. I sat there holding the last thing the person that made me smile, the person that always reminded me I was beautiful, the person that was my first love, and the person that made me believe love was real. Putting the flower in the palm of my hand, taking one last look at it, finally forming a fist a crushing something that was my everything to nothing. With my hand still in a fist form I picked up my phone and dialed who I needed to call. After I hit the call button and heard the phone ring for about 15 seconds I was greeted by a young female on the other line. “Hi, this is Harper Souders. I was wondering if I could make an appointment with Dr.Harris about a surgery?”